Have not be writing for awhile as I thought perhaps it is about time that I forget about my past and don't let it hold me hostage .... And moving on from being a gambling addict !!!
I tried many times to write ..... but end up deleting the post .... seems to be frustrated with what I am writing .....
But is it Possible for me to lead a Gambling Free life since ...... YES .... and of course NO !!!
(i am still buying hope in toto and 4d hahaha)
Back then....
In the beginning of recovery back in end 2006, I TRIED .... and for 3 years .... isolate myself from all gambling activities and related news ..... So any changes in my life ..... NOPE ... except for staying Stop,
I BECAME MORE frustrated ... more angry with people places and things in my country .
I know I am more capable of doing big things and earning a much respectable pay .....
But no longer possible in a place like here. It's time really to let go of the aspiration of another big break in life..... hahaha again i might not be able to handle this Big Break!!
Over last 2 years or so .... i have this awakening and suddenly i realisee i already had that breakthrough in life....
My Family = My Everything.
Since 2014 to now Sep 2016... I focus on rebuilding and strengthening my relationship with my love ones at home... And with my parents too!!! At the same time, focusing on removing the letter "A" in me .... ANGER !!
10 years on.... slow progress.... and recovery is a slow process......and is forever
But it has been keeping me safe and sane.
So why am i updating now after missing for 2years??
Some thought i went back to gambling .....
Some thought i fully recover .....
Doesnt matter what others think abt me and wat i am doing....
I am still rebuilding my life and Yes ... for the time being .... I AM STILL SAFE ...
I am aware of the relapse process far too well and I am not going to fall into the same trap..
And all it takes to start the process of relapse ....... is just a simple white lie !!!!
Oh yess.... one more thing...
Even if you are right ....try seeing life from my side ...
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